Engineers often get a bad rap. Too many folks see them as techies without a fun-loving side. But somewhere there are engineers doing stand-up comedy or firing off one-liners over lunch. Chances are, their routines might include these two items...

To the optimist, the glass is half full.

To the pessimist, the glass is half empty.

To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

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On the train to a math and engineering convention, a group of math majors and a group of engineering majors sat in the same car. Each of the math majors had his ticket, but it became clear that the group of engineers had only ONE ticket among them. The math majors started laughing and snickering.

When one of the engineers said, “Here comes the conductor,” all of the engineers went into the bathroom. The math majors were puzzled. Coming down the aisle the conductor said, “tickets please,” and collected tickets from all the math majors. He then went to the bathroom, knocked on the door and said “ticket please,” and the engineers stuck the ticket under the door. The conductor took it and left. The engineers came out of the bathroom a few minutes later. The math majors felt really stupid.

So, on the way back from the convention, the group of math majors had one ticket for the group. They started snickering at the engineers because, this time, the whole group had NO tickets at all.

When the engineer lookout gave the warning -- “Conductor coming!” -- all of the engineers went to one bathroom. All the math majors went to another bathroom. Before the conductor reached their end of the aisle, one of the engineers left the bathroom, knocked on the other bathroom, and said “ticket please.”

To the optimist, the glass is half full.

To the pessimist, the glass is half empty.

To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

*************************************************************

On the train to a math and engineering convention, a group of math majors and a group of engineering majors sat in the same car. Each of the math majors had his ticket, but it became clear that the group of engineers had only ONE ticket among them. The math majors started laughing and snickering.

When one of the engineers said, “Here comes the conductor,” all of the engineers went into the bathroom. The math majors were puzzled. Coming down the aisle the conductor said, “tickets please,” and collected tickets from all the math majors. He then went to the bathroom, knocked on the door and said “ticket please,” and the engineers stuck the ticket under the door. The conductor took it and left. The engineers came out of the bathroom a few minutes later. The math majors felt really stupid.

So, on the way back from the convention, the group of math majors had one ticket for the group. They started snickering at the engineers because, this time, the whole group had NO tickets at all.

When the engineer lookout gave the warning -- “Conductor coming!” -- all of the engineers went to one bathroom. All the math majors went to another bathroom. Before the conductor reached their end of the aisle, one of the engineers left the bathroom, knocked on the other bathroom, and said “ticket please.”

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